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I left Hell and I'm reaching for Heaven, it's not easy...but this year I will! 2012 is mine!
Please realize that this site of mine includes a lot of inappropriate content for children and teenagers. Bad language and a lot of SEX (grin...). You have to be over 18 years old to be here.
About Me
I came to America from Europe a few years ago. I just turned 40 and decided that my life needs a dramatic turn if I'm ever going to reach my heaven on earth.
I had many illnesses as a child, fighting just to be able to walk but the times when I could, all I wanted to do was to dance ballet or explore the forest and ocean. After my mom got a divorce from my step dad my life changed dramatically. My teenage years included many moves, it was filled with sexual abuse, rapes, 3 foster care families, juvenile, strip joints, being on the run, suicide attempts and also being very alone.
My first child made me take responsibility and change my life to the better but I was still a very lost and restless soul. My adult life kept going in the fast lane and includes tragedies like cancer, abduction of my son, death of my daughters father, an engagement to a con artist etc. With my children I found a reason to be better and to exist but I need to find my place, my life and my meaning. There have to be a reason to why I had gone through so much and I hope that reason is to help others.
I have 3 children with three different fathers and even though I know I am a kind, generous and good looking woman, I am very alone. I don't know why. (Not many know about my past) Maybe I'm a loner, maybe I'm scarred or like to torture myself quietly. I hope I will find my reasons out and that I can change it. I'm not suited to be alone.
I also have 20 -25 lbs to loose. For some people it doesn't seem much but for me it has a deeper meaning. I have attached my past abuse to my fat and I can't let go. My blogs will include a lot of this struggle.
To my children: If you think this website belongs to your Mom, get out of here immidietely as this is NOT for you to read and come talk to me. (Love Ya)
My Goals for 2012!
Some might think they seem silly and shallow but I have never done anything good for myself and there is a deeper reason behind them. My life has been about surviving and to raise my children and do what's best for them. Now I want to start living! If you start fallowing my blogs you will understand.
My hope is that my life will open up the minds of people so we won't judge or be afraid of the things we do not understand and realize that knowledge is the key to both love and power. Hopefully you use your knowledge wisely.
I also take my life and experiences with a great sense of humor. You have to laugh! I am here, I am still happy and there are so many ways of looking at one incident - I choose the positive route!
A very BIG reason for this website is to make money. I work a regular job, I am stabile there and so grateful for it, but I only make $14.00 an hour and it's not enough to support my 3 children. I also work till 8 pm and my children need more time with me. They are teenagers now and I know they need me more then ever. I want to be a great mom! I want to be more present so I can take them to activities, friends, help with school, cook and say Good Night to them. If they are home alone a lot they get a little sad, they sit in front of the computer and get ideas that are not always so great and I don't believe this is good for any child.
By being my reader, you really help me and my children out, and I appreciate it so Thank You! A big dream is to make this website known so I can add more bloggers and help more people through charity. If you have 5 dollars over, or more (grin) we accept donations anytime! Just click here...;)
I like that you take the time to contact me...mostly if it's good lol but please understand that I have a REALLY busy life, I'm not just ignorant, so I will get back to you as soon as I read your email.
Thank You!
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